Suspended wedding cakes, multiple engagement rings and prickly centrepieces are predicted to be the wedding trends to watch in 2014, but the Federal Government would like to add pre-marriage counselling on that list too. [No idea what a ‘prickly centrepiece is? Check out this wedding trends article on The Knot].
From 1 July, couples “who are married, intending to marry or who are in a committed relationship, including same-sex couples” can apply for a ‘relationship voucher’, a $200 subsidy for “marriage and relationship education and counselling”. The Federal Government is trialling the vouchers over 12 months, offering vouchers to 100,000 couples, and evaluating results to see if they will introduce a longer term scheme.
The scheme aims to “help couples achieve a greater degree of happiness and stability and thereby a better environment for their children,” said a spokesperson for Mr Andrews.
Dennis Outred from Marriage Week Australia, with his wife Ann, was former national coordinator of the Alpha pre-marriage course since 2003, rolling out the program in churches and groups across the country for 7 years. He’s also accredited to run the Prepare-Enrich marriage course and FOCCUS program, both popular in churches around the country.
According to Dennis, the idea of pre-marriage counselling has always put many people off. “It’s dismissed by a lot of people—they think they already know what they need to know.”
But in his experience, learning how to ‘do’ marriage is like learning how to drive a car—there is damage is both when education of either is poor, or non-existent.
“We can very easily affect the lives of others if we don’t understand our partners correctly.”
And yet, says Dennis, there are still many churches who don’t offer a marriage preparation course of any kind when marrying Christians or non-Christians in their churches.
“You’ve got to remember that something like 70 per cent of marriages are performed by people other than a minister of religion…” says Dennis. “So, as far as churches are concerned, [not offering pre-marriage counselling] when they have the chance to … it’s a lost opportunity.”
Christians in general, says Dennis, are more likely to do a marriage preparation course, at the suggestion of their minister. But the Government’s initiative will help a growing trend of scoffers.
“We’d go to a bridal expo and young couples, or at least the young brides we spoke with, would laugh at the idea. ‘It’s not the sort of thing we do these days,’ they’d say.”
“It’s very sad. They’d spend hours preparing for the wedding … and spend thousands and thousands of dollars on it, but invest nothing in preparing for the marriage itself,” says Dennis.
Perhaps Dennis hasn’t seen the list of wedding trends for 2014, but we suspect he’s better off for not.
Photo: Flickr under Creative Commons License, Andrew Morrell Photography.
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